I know I say this all the time but I can’t believe another school year is starting… senior year. Monday was my last first day of school… ever. Weird, right? Still not sure what I want to do. Still taking a path that may not lead anywhere. Still going through every day, doing everything I want and need to do, working through the things I need to work through, and learning to be okay. Just like everyone else is, in their own way.
I’m a big “let’s start over” type of person. I love a new challenge. This new year brings a million more goals that I want to achieve than I wanted before. This one is even bigger though. Because by the end of this year, I need to have a job. A real job, with benefits and holiday parties. The things you only really ever see in movies when you’re my age.
College has been such an adjustment. It has changed everything for me, but also given me amazing people and a home. I feel like it’s just starting to feel like everything is coming together here. Everything is good here. But, then, I realize that it’s almost over. Right when it starts getting good.
There are a lot of things I want to accomplish this year that are new. Create an amazing new staff and 22 issues of our newspaper, excel at my job with NBC (and potentially be offered another one after that), of course, all A’s, and, most importantly, to just relax and enjoy this last year. Life is exhausting, and college is the time to just take a minute to breathe before it all gets too real.
I feel like everyone around me is in one or two modes: complete panic over the reality of looking for jobs, or in complete denial that it’s senior year. I think I’m somewhere in the middle. I’m hyper-aware of the fact that it’s senior year, but kind of also telling myself that we have time. A whole 8 months, right?
I was meeting with a professor today who told me that he tells all of his A students after first semester that their first priority should be to relax and enjoy their senior year. My brain doesn’t want to relax. It wants to panic and push me to my limits. I can already feel it. But I think I’m going to make it a point to wake up every morning and make sure I plan to take a minute to appreciate everything. It should’ve been that way, every day, for a long time. It all moves too fast to even take that minute, though.