A year and a few days ago was the day that I joined a sorority – Chi Omega. I came into junior year so heartbroken about losing swimming that I knew I needed something. I told my boyfriend that I needed to get involved with something else on campus and he quickly suggested I rush a sorority. I had always believed that it wouldn’t be something I’d enjoy, but at that point, I figured, why not? I approached recruitment weekend with more nerves than anything I’d ever done. What if I wore the wrong shoes or said the wrong thing? What if none of them wanted me and I was dropped by all of them? They said that I would know what was right because I would feel what felt like home, but every day felt uncomfortable to me. I was so nervous about showing who I was, that I don’t think I really did. I was this rigid version of myself who put on a little bit of a facade.

It came down to two sororities that I really liked and Chi Omega was my final choice. The girls were great, the community service held great opportunities, but it wasn’t for me. I continuously had the feeling that it wasn’t where I belonged. I don’t think there’s a home for me in Greek life. I miss being an athlete more than anything, and I wanted to replace that with something else, only to find that there’s no way I could do that.

I made friends with some amazing people in Chi O, and I am so grateful for that. It’s just funny to see how different it is to be an athlete vs. what it’s like to be part of an organization that is more formal. It turns out I was made for the sweatshirt and sweatpants life.

I think part of the problem with my sorority experience was that I rushed as a junior – I didn’t have much time to meet people because we initiated in January. The freshman and sophomores seemed hesitant to get to know me, even though all I wanted was to make friends. Literally.

It cost money and time, and I honestly didn’t get much out of it, which was maybe because I was a little bit closed minded. Honestly, though, I am so glad I did it.

I’m actually really proud of myself for going outside of my comfort zone. Joining a sorority was something I never ever thought I would do, but it was a chance to give something else a chance to fill a void.

I guess the moral of the story is, I don’t regret trying something that didn’t work out because it had the potential to be something great. Another thought – no experience is ever going to replace another. Being a division 1 athlete is something that not many people get to do, and I loved every minute of it. I’ll always be grateful for that.

By the way – here’s a picture of my fluffy baby girl with the Chi Omega rock on campus.

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